Author: The Stoner Mom

Building a Summer Schedule

Summer frightens the mom of school-aged children. Those mandatory hours of peace and an empty house go away and now it’s up to Mrs. Mom to entertain, educate, and be responsible for their knees and brains. For the divorced mom though, summer can seem like a blessing. Joint custody means there are times I don’t have them, and when I do have them they are in school for many of those hours. The summer is a unique time for the kids to see a slightly less regimented Mama. Road trips and no homework after dinner. A steady stream of...

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The Stoner Mom Demonstrates: Playing GTAV Stoned

Whats up party people! Here is your Thursday Stoner Session video. In this one I am enjoying Permafrost- a sativa hybrid with an intoxicating sweet scent. I’ve also finally figured out how to get footage from the Xbox over to my computer, which means one thing. Video games. Today I’m showing a teeny tiny sampling of stuff I do in Grand Theft Auto. Please note that my character and I are wearing matching outfits. Because I am just that rad. GTA really needs a yoga pant section in its clothing choices. I guess you have to go PC to find...

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The Stoner Mom Reviews: Wet Dream, for an afternoon pick-me-up

  Wet Dream Sativa Genetics: Blue Dream x Ocean Beach Haze The last time I needed weed, I popped into the neighborhood dispensary and did not embark on the 30 minute trek to my favorite dispensary. The weed from our home grow was almost done curing, so I needed less weed than usual, making the drive to Boulder less worth it. I did not know what kind of pot I wanted. This was one of those trips where I let the bud-tender make all the decisions for me. I asked for a hybrid or Sativa, and gushing effusively he headed...

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Wake and Bake Tuesday!

Happy morning stoners and friends! Did a lot of admin work on the site and have settled on a new video schedule on my YouTube Channel. I’ll be posting new videos every Tuesday and Thursday (hopefully, you know how it goes). Coming up we’ll have more tutorials, stoner sesh’s, wake and bakes and more. As always I’m interested to hear what my readers and viewers want to see, so if you have an idea hit the Contact link and send me a message. Enjoy the video! (I will probably take this one down at some point… I think I...

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Motivational Monday MotherF*cker- Mothers Day Edition

Mothers Day was yesterday. It’s not a holiday I enjoy. It makes me sad and uncomfortable, not because I don’t have a good mother (I do) but because of the exclusionary nature of it. It is not a holiday for all to enjoy. Indeed, for many it is an annual event of discomfort and pain. Because of this it feels unnecessary to me, and try not to celebrate it any more than I need. My true feelings are that I am sad for the children without mothers, the mothers without children, the mothers whose children have rejected them, the...

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Stoned on Pinterest

I’ve had a love affair with Pinterest for many years. I remember when it first came out! Pinterest has passed the longevity test and is wonderfully useful for any number of things. Most moms in the suburbs have a Pinterest account, and are have experienced the hypnosis that comes with beautiful pictures + infinite scroll. When you’re stoned on Pinterest the hypnosis is really no different. I guess in this case Pinterest is the dominant substance. This spring I’m using it to organize the projects planned for the house. Follow The Stoner Mom’s board Spring Cleaning Projects on Pinterest.I’ll also be using it to plan this summer. I’m determined to keep their school skills sharp so there are no freak-outs when school starts up again. I also really want to enjoy all of them this summer, and to really build on the foundation of our family. I’m thinking, lots of evenings in the backyard, with a fire and marshmallows and plenty of bug spray. Follow The Stoner Mom’s board Stay-at-Home Summer Camp on...

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Spring Cleaning with The Stoner Mom: Bar Cart Makeover

Okay people. So Spring has sprung, meaning it’s time to open the curtains and start airing out your respective habitats. Spring cleaning is one of my favorite things. We bought our house two years ago, and it’s still in a state of deferred maintenance. There are so many things we want to do. When we purchased the home we were under a lot of pressure. I had just divorced and the six of us were all living in an apartment. The end of the lease was quickly approaching, and we were desperate for a five bedroom house so that...

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Motivational Monday Motherf*cker! Blunt Blowin’.

One of my favorite Lil Wayne songs, Blunt Blowin’ never fails to get me pumped. A perfect driving song, a perfect getting high song. Easy to follow and with a hook revolving around blowing your blunt and not giving a gosh darn. I’mma blunt blowin’, Polo drawers showin’ I don’t give a lovely motherfuck ass nigga With my money growing, no matter where you going You don’t need a bus pass for me to bust yo ass, nigga The Stoner Mom likes any decent anthem of defiance really. Weezy is a master at not caring. In the strict world of...

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Cannabis Photography by The Stoner Mom

Cannabis photography is a relaxing past-time for me. It’s my old person hobby that keeps my mind limber and satisfied. Having a quiet house and piles of weed scattered around to arrange in some tasteful way is such a stress reliever. Here are some of my favorite shots of some of the different marijuana strains I have enjoyed. I hope they get your mouth...

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Wake and Bake: April 18, 2015

Happy 420! It’s a regular Monday for The Stoner Mom, so no, I have no awesome cannabis related plans. I do have awesome being with my kids plans. Anyway, here is my wake and bake session from Saturday morning, where I get through FOUR bowls, all by my lonesome. I must admit, I’m a bit proud of my massive tolerance and ability to smoke a ton of weed. It’s really a remarkable...

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Motivational Monday! Nah, Fuck it, It’s 420!

Moms, no need to motivate today. It’s April 20, the national get motherf*cking stoned day. Here’s a tip from one mom to another, don’t let your kid go out tonight. And make sure they are where they say they are during school. Every kid wants to explore but The Stoner Mom is sooooo against developing brains using marijuana to get high, it’s not even funny. Don’t be ignorant, and use today as a conversation starter with your kids. On to Monday’s music. Back when I was young you couldn’t be a California girl without some doofus boy insisting we...

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The Stoner Mom Reviews: The Arizer Extreme Q

The Arizer Extreme Q- Mom’s best kept secret! By now you’ve seen me use my vaporizer in a few different videos. I have the Arizer Extreme Q, a small  home vaporizer that plugs into the wall but is extremely light and easy to transport. At a price point that is much lower than a Volcano, the Arizer is a strong contender for a personal vaporizer. Because of its efficiency, ease of use, and affordability, the Arizer Extreme is a great choice for those curious to start vaping. The Arizer Extreme is an all in one product and comes with everything...

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The Stoner Mom Diaries: No School Days

  April 12, 2015 Last Friday I found myself with a no school day for my girls. Days from school are kind of a treat for me now. I have my daughters during the weekdays and since they’ve both started the same school schedule it’s been a very routine life for us. When they were little and not in school yet I would fill our days with classes and trips. I had a membership everywhere, music classes for both from the time they were babies. Gymnastics and classes at the zoo. Mom and baby swim class, night nature hikes....

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Should your kids see you high? | Ask The Stoner Mom

  Should your kids see you high? The Stoner Mom tries very hard to come from a non-judgemental place. I understand that the practices in my home are unique to me, I don’t expect readers to hold them as the standards for responsible stoner parenting. It’s important to me to share my practices as a stoner mom, simply because there are not a lot of good examples of normal stoner moms out there. You’ve read from my parenting philosophies that I believe very strongly in the power of modeling. As the mother and stepmother to three daughters, I know that everything...

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Mom Tip: Eat the Frog

There’s a quote, often attributed to Mark Twain, If it’s your job to eat a frog, it’s best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it’s your job to eat two frogs, it’s best to eat the biggest one first. Your “frog” is the days worst task, the ONE thing you have to do but don’t want to do. The idea is if you get that out of the way first, your day can only get better. No matter what, you’ve at least eaten that stupid frog you were supposed to eat. Today’s Stoner Mom’s tip is...

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Strain Review- Kosher Kush

Kosher Kush Indica Ah, the award-winning strain that holds the distinction of being blessed by a rabbi. Kosher Kush is a pungent and powerful Indica that relaxes the body and eases the mind, effortlessly, into sleep. Kosher Kush has an earthy, heady, smell and taste. A wonderful strain for enhancing creativity and just enjoying being in your own head. Good for treating chronic pain, nausea, and definitely for insomnia. I also love Kosher Kush for menstrual discomfort. However, the newbie stoner mom needs to keep this one kept away for nights when free of child responsibilities. This strain has...

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Complexions and Motivational Monday

I was listening to Kendrick Lamar in the car the other day and was particularly enjoying Complexion (A Zulu Love). A song about skin tone, colorization, segregation, slavery, race and gangs. I ain’t talkin’ Jay, I ain’t talkin’ Bey I’m talkin’ days we got school watchin’ movie screens And spike your self esteem The new James Bond gon’ be black as me Black as brown, hazelnut, cinnamon, black tea And it’s all beautiful to me Call your brothers magnificent, call all the sisters queens We all on the same team, blues and pirus, no colors ain’t a thing.  ...

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10 Tips to Avoid Looking Like a Total Stoner

Stoned Thoughts on Beauty I’m not the mommy blogger that’s going to tell you all that you aren’t good enough because you aren’t gorgeous. As a mom, I am not about teaching vanity to my children. People come in a vast array of packages and true beauty is the person who is happy being just the way they are. That’s what I try to teach my kids at least. That we’re all beautiful, uniquely so. That one persons unkept beauty is just as valid as another’s high maintenance glamour. Art shows us that beauty comes in a thousand forms, none surpassing...

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Wake and Bake: April 4 2015

Waking and Baking- enjoying the first high of the day. Hi friends! Enjoy today’s Wake and Bake session from this morning. Bed hair and epic stonage by the end of this one. I had a request to smoke a blunt so in todays video I give a hashy roll a try. Smoking blunts or joints is not really my thing, but it’s kinda cool every once in awhile. It certainly got me stoned at...

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