High by The Beach: Travel with Weed

When contemplating entering an American airport with cannabis, the average responsible adult is likely to start sweating profusely before deciding no freaking way. I mean, we’re not idiots.

But when you are a medical patient, you find yourself in the peculiar place where your right to medication, legally prescribed and legal in half of our states, is endangered. And it can piss you off. You ask yourself, who is the fucking government to tell me that I can’t use my prescribed medication on vacation?

There is a point when your personal freedoms become far more important to you than obeying the law. I never thought I would say that, but now as an adult, I know that government institutions are rarely without corruption and that no one knows more about my personal health and safety than I do. Certainly, no piece of legislature put into effect by politicians without an inkling of education, insight, or foresight to the challenges facing American citizen’s generations later.

So what is a responsible cannabis-using adult to do? In the past, I would say never take the chance, I’d be a negative Nellie, but today I am 100% willing to take that chance. And not only that, I am ready to take a STAND against an ambiguous law that I know to be unjust and harmful to the people.

So, fuck your fear and your paranoia. I’m not going to pussyfoot around medicine that has literally saved my life and kept me from offing myself. I’m so over apologizing to everybody for NOTHING. I’m so tired of living as if I am somehow truly guilty of something.

Here are some thoughts to help you make your own decision about whether or not its worth it for you to take that stand.

Worthy of your Consideration

TSA is not law enforcement

They can’t arrest you. Additionally, when they are x-raying your shit, they aren’t looking for your personal stash of weed. You can quite literally take a joint, shove it into a pack of cigarettes, toss that in your carry-on and throw that shit on the conveyor belt. If for some reason you have angered the burned-out TSA employee who happened to notice your ganja, the most they can do is refer to local law enforcement. Not that it would matter because seriously, what is the incentive for that employee to summon the airport police over your wrinkled j? They don’t get a bonus. They don’t get a medal. They get an angry traveler and annoyed law enforcement that has like, actual terrorism to deal with.

Traveling with a Bomb? Don’t Bring your Cannabis

Okay, all that shit that scares you at the airport? The dogs? The chemical wipes? It’s for BOMBS. NOT WEED. Unless you’re in bonafide drug country, those are not drug dogs. They are BOMB DOGS. So, if you are traveling with explosives, you should probably leave the weed stash at home.

The biggest red flag items in your luggage, be it carry-on or checked, are liquids and electronics, mostly liquids Think of all the things that get mistaken for bombs, like uh… breastmilk and alarm clocks. None of it looks like marijuana, which is literally a dried herb.

Quantity and Smell are Key

If your carry-on reeks of marijuana, what do you expect a reasonable adult on the clock to do? At least respect the dudes working their thankless job that everyone hates them for, and keep your stash in a smell-proof, dark container.

The amount of cannabis you are traveling with is also essential to consider. Keep it well under an ounce of flower or joints. If you need way more than that spread out your medication with edibles and wax, both perfectly reasonable to travel with as long as it doesn’t stink and isn’t excessive amounts.

TSA really doesn’t give a shit about your weed, but if you attract attention to yourself because you didn’t pack your stash properly, you are asking for trouble. Be reasonable and take the bare minimum.

Medical Card? Use it

Keep your medical card with you in your wallet, and if you are traveling with cannabis in your checked luggage make a copy of it and place it with your stash.

Common Sense, and Act without Guilt

Common sense is on the responsible stoners side. The states are nearly united in the belief that our drug laws are bullshit, absent of any common sense.

Guilty people hide things. They hollow out shampoo bottles or tape baggies to their testicles. When they get caught it’s because they spent way too much time freaking out about it. Operate without guilt. You aren’t smoking on the plane. You aren’t selling it. Give yourself a break and be cool.

International Flight? No. No. No. Just no.

Okay, I’m willing to deal with my American consequences, but that is freaking all. Never, ever, ever put your safety in the hands of another country when it comes to travelling with a personal supply of marijuana. It very likely will not go well for you.


Down to Brass Tacks: How to Do It

In carry-on: Take a small amount (like a couple of grams) keep it in the smell proof airtight container you get from the dispensary. Bonus points if it has your patient id and prescription info.

Buy a pouch made of organic fibers and toss your container in there. Throw in some rolling papers. Place the pouch in your carry-on with other random items: magazines, stick deodorant, pens, and paper. Do not put any liquids or electronics in this bag.

When going through security keep electronics and liquids in a separate bin from your carry-on. Let your weed travel serenely through the x-ray. Smile graciously when handed your bins of personal items. Take your carry on and proceed to your gate, wiping the sweat from your brow and dreaming of the soonest moment you can spark one up.

In checked luggage: Follow the same procedure regarding amounts and containers. Put the stash in the bottom of your toiletries bag, or shove it deep within your socks. Another foolproof spot- put a baggie of it in your pants pocket, folded and packed with the rest of your clothes.

Conclusion

When you start the research into flying domestically with weed, you will be amazed by the amount of articles urging you to just relax and go for it. You’ll also find the occasional negative Nellie that will call you an idiot for breaking federal law. ultimately it’s your choice as to what level of risk you are comfortable with taking. Some people have way more of a reason to fight for access to their medication than others. Regardless of your reasons, best of luck on your travels.

Author

The Stoner Mom is a pulled-together, WAHM, SAHM, boo-boo kissing supermom. Most would assume she is not stoned. Most would be quite wrong.

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